[Story] My Undergraduate Struggles

Rather than lacking academic ability, I got a low GPA at University of Toronto because I contributed my time in undergraduate study to exploring professional interests through extensive internships while resisting ADHD, addressing my initial resistance to meritocratic principles, and grappling with an intense drive for innovation and uniqueness that often disregarded academic standards and practical considerations.

Initially, I resisted traditional academic standards due to disillusionment with China’s rigid education system and the unfair societal divides linked to academic achievement. Admitted to UofT, I felt complicit in class-based discrimination against my talented peers outside academic norms, prompting a misguided rebellion to Meritocracy that led to poor grades. The COVID-19 pandemic, online negativity, and personal mental health Bipolar struggles radicalized these beliefs. However, I eventually realized that my performance wasn't a competition and that focusing on self-discipline and technical skills would better equip me to actually address societal inequalities like the abovementioned unequal education resources instead of resorting to the immature act of deliberately underperforming within the current academic framework. I shifted from academics to internships when my grades were no longer competitive.

Thus, I embarked on a three-year psychotherapy training program and tech company interns outside of my studies while attending networking events and internships. Due to my ADHD and low energy levels, I struggled to multitask in the hectic schedule, further hampering my academic performance. To address this, I developed a personalized time management strategy to accommodate my educational and extracurricular ambitions.

Finally, after growing up in a Chinese education system that suppressed creative and critical thinking, I found freedom in Canada’s education system through my social science courses. However, original insights that lacked full academic rigor scored lower than conventional topics that were well-substantiated. Also, my extreme pursuit of innovative and unique perspectives trapped me in a cycle of prioritizing uniqueness over soundness, novelty over practicality, and exploration over building a solid foundation, prompting me to document rebellious ideas, refining them into guidance for research or practice only when fully developed, building my unique note system of inspiration and knowledge beyond conventions.

Personal Growth: In Chinese culture, life is often seen as unforgiving, where a single misstep can lead to total failure. Yet, my experiences have shown that life’s margin for error is far greater than we think. During three rounds of struggle to improve my undergraduate performance, I learned the power of composure, critical thinking, and perseverance. These challenges taught me that no problem is insurmountable with a calm and focused mindset. The resilience and maturity I’ve gained from these experiences are now core strengths I’ll carry into my future studies and career, enabling me to navigate obstacles with confidence and determination.